gene77
03-14 10:44 PM
Sent interfiling request on Mar-03 and raised a SR last week. No LUDs yet .....
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xyzgc
02-08 01:50 PM
Hi,
I been a member of IV for a long time and just to keep myself anonymous for a while I created this account. I am so sorry for opening a thread in a completely irrelevant forum but I have no idea what to do. So, I request all the members to please help me by providing some kind of information.
Here is my story:
I came to US in 2002 and completed masters and been working since then. I got married couple of years ago. Whatever the monetary gifts the girls parents gave as part of the marriage, I put all that in an account on the girls name within 2 days of the marriage. We came to India and from then on the problems started. She and her parents want me to separate from my parents and support their family by sending money to their parents which I couldn't do. How can I leave my parents in their old age when they worked very hard to give a decent life. She has been harassing me mentally for this all the time. Recently her parents have been threatening me saying they will file dowry case in India if I don't send money or cut myself off from my parents. I provided for the girl in all possible ways, even encouraged her to join school to get a masters degree which she stopped soon. We had a baby recently and my parents visited us to help us with the baby. She started harassing them too by saying something or other.
I am very frustrated at this situation and I don't know what to do. I am on H1B and applied for 485 too. At times I feel like applying for divorce but when I think about my little baby I am not able to take that step. The house we currently live in, I bought long before the marriage. It came to a situation where we cannot live together. I cannot ask her to go out of the house because she doesn't have anywhere to go and with the baby even if she leaves, it will be very tough. I said I will leave the house and stay in a apartment for which she threatens to commit suicide. So, I don't know what to do. I am worried about my baby because between all this my baby's life will be spoiled and I don't want that. Can anyone please tell me what I can do in this matter?
Thank you very much for taking time to read this.
When you hear incidents like this, its always like "girls are too much". On the contrary, when we hear of wives being beaten up by "educated husbands" boys are too much. This is all silly really.
I have heard some indian females complaining all the time how males tend to dominate everywhere its not really true. In a relationship, anyone could be a dominant partner - male or female. Dominance also means responsibility and taking initiative. So its not all that bad. And it is certainly not a male prerogative!!
Your case is a clear case of "external interference". Divorce is not a solution to cases like these. Its not like you are not getting along. You relationship is spoiled due to unwanted interference. Convince your wife that you and her always come first. You cannot make your parents happy at the cost of displeasing her and also the other way round.
Stop trying to diplomatic and stop being a family-pleaser. If you don't like something, say it clear and upfront rather than pussy footing around it. I found that diplomacy does not work at all. It only sends wrong signals and eventually you end up putting a firm foot down, anyways.
Get rid of the elders from your life. It means don't allow parents/siblings from either sides to interfere at all in any decision making. Get the inputs but make it clear its a joint decision made by husband-wife and they have no say in it. Don't allow your parents/in-laws to stay with you more than bare minimum necessary for the new-born.
If it means making some career sacrifices, so be it. Its your baby and you need to take care of it finally.
Retrospect - analyze what has gone wrong. Today, you find your wife is all wrong and you are all right but when you do the retrospect you'll find its not like that, in fact its never like that. Humans make mistakes and we must accept that.
Stop sending money to parents and in-laws, if its possible. Otherwise, maintain parity by sending money in small amounts to both parents. Its stupid to say my wife is not working so she has no business to send money to her parents. Its so wrong and I'm surprised folks can think like this. Marriage is about sharing and even a child will tell you that. If the in-laws are any sensible they won't accept gifts from the son-in-law but its for them to decide.And stop receiving any gifts from either sides.
If you are in the US, don't go to your home country unless its an absolute must. I found that every time I go there family and relatives end up giving tons of unsolicited advice. The intentions are good but I have to keep saying no (diplomacy doesn't work at all) and that gets very annoying eventually.
Finally, if you have a career oriented working wife there are advantages to it. Its better to work instead of being a hopeless housewife.
Yes, it also means you can't take things for granted but that's no reason you should end up with a sweet, traditional house wife who'll no longer be that way when hopelessness sets in.
I been a member of IV for a long time and just to keep myself anonymous for a while I created this account. I am so sorry for opening a thread in a completely irrelevant forum but I have no idea what to do. So, I request all the members to please help me by providing some kind of information.
Here is my story:
I came to US in 2002 and completed masters and been working since then. I got married couple of years ago. Whatever the monetary gifts the girls parents gave as part of the marriage, I put all that in an account on the girls name within 2 days of the marriage. We came to India and from then on the problems started. She and her parents want me to separate from my parents and support their family by sending money to their parents which I couldn't do. How can I leave my parents in their old age when they worked very hard to give a decent life. She has been harassing me mentally for this all the time. Recently her parents have been threatening me saying they will file dowry case in India if I don't send money or cut myself off from my parents. I provided for the girl in all possible ways, even encouraged her to join school to get a masters degree which she stopped soon. We had a baby recently and my parents visited us to help us with the baby. She started harassing them too by saying something or other.
I am very frustrated at this situation and I don't know what to do. I am on H1B and applied for 485 too. At times I feel like applying for divorce but when I think about my little baby I am not able to take that step. The house we currently live in, I bought long before the marriage. It came to a situation where we cannot live together. I cannot ask her to go out of the house because she doesn't have anywhere to go and with the baby even if she leaves, it will be very tough. I said I will leave the house and stay in a apartment for which she threatens to commit suicide. So, I don't know what to do. I am worried about my baby because between all this my baby's life will be spoiled and I don't want that. Can anyone please tell me what I can do in this matter?
Thank you very much for taking time to read this.
When you hear incidents like this, its always like "girls are too much". On the contrary, when we hear of wives being beaten up by "educated husbands" boys are too much. This is all silly really.
I have heard some indian females complaining all the time how males tend to dominate everywhere its not really true. In a relationship, anyone could be a dominant partner - male or female. Dominance also means responsibility and taking initiative. So its not all that bad. And it is certainly not a male prerogative!!
Your case is a clear case of "external interference". Divorce is not a solution to cases like these. Its not like you are not getting along. You relationship is spoiled due to unwanted interference. Convince your wife that you and her always come first. You cannot make your parents happy at the cost of displeasing her and also the other way round.
Stop trying to diplomatic and stop being a family-pleaser. If you don't like something, say it clear and upfront rather than pussy footing around it. I found that diplomacy does not work at all. It only sends wrong signals and eventually you end up putting a firm foot down, anyways.
Get rid of the elders from your life. It means don't allow parents/siblings from either sides to interfere at all in any decision making. Get the inputs but make it clear its a joint decision made by husband-wife and they have no say in it. Don't allow your parents/in-laws to stay with you more than bare minimum necessary for the new-born.
If it means making some career sacrifices, so be it. Its your baby and you need to take care of it finally.
Retrospect - analyze what has gone wrong. Today, you find your wife is all wrong and you are all right but when you do the retrospect you'll find its not like that, in fact its never like that. Humans make mistakes and we must accept that.
Stop sending money to parents and in-laws, if its possible. Otherwise, maintain parity by sending money in small amounts to both parents. Its stupid to say my wife is not working so she has no business to send money to her parents. Its so wrong and I'm surprised folks can think like this. Marriage is about sharing and even a child will tell you that. If the in-laws are any sensible they won't accept gifts from the son-in-law but its for them to decide.And stop receiving any gifts from either sides.
If you are in the US, don't go to your home country unless its an absolute must. I found that every time I go there family and relatives end up giving tons of unsolicited advice. The intentions are good but I have to keep saying no (diplomacy doesn't work at all) and that gets very annoying eventually.
Finally, if you have a career oriented working wife there are advantages to it. Its better to work instead of being a hopeless housewife.
Yes, it also means you can't take things for granted but that's no reason you should end up with a sweet, traditional house wife who'll no longer be that way when hopelessness sets in.
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paisa
09-10 02:40 PM
Guys,
Its only Green card and I am not sure why people get upset big deal. Nobody asked us to move here. And if there is a system in place we cannot be saying its bad and this and that. My PD is DEC 04 do I feel bad someone in 2006 gets it. YES. Is the system crappy yes. I have a MS in US. So all this hoopla about US ms are getting it and not us is wrong. The other question is should I be getting it over others who dont have a MS from US. I believe yes we should.
but thats my thoughts on the subject if someone does not like it I respect his thoughts.
Its only Green card and I am not sure why people get upset big deal. Nobody asked us to move here. And if there is a system in place we cannot be saying its bad and this and that. My PD is DEC 04 do I feel bad someone in 2006 gets it. YES. Is the system crappy yes. I have a MS in US. So all this hoopla about US ms are getting it and not us is wrong. The other question is should I be getting it over others who dont have a MS from US. I believe yes we should.
but thats my thoughts on the subject if someone does not like it I respect his thoughts.
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seahawks
07-06 02:34 AM
let me ask you this. did anyone from "leadership" call/email/contact you when you were inactive/busy with your life. if the leaders did not call/email you, how will you know if your help is needed. i don't see how its u'r fault
yep, they did, they called email me and asked me to contact other people and organize in a state chapter level. They are also helping on getting other people to help me mobilize members from a state chapter level. The point is the sense of urgency on how we need to move forward together. There is absolutely no room for confusion and I agree when people dont see results, there is always suspicion. But to build an organization from scratch is no easy task, we must recognize that and be respectful of people who do put their time and efforts to make things happen. We all must channelize our energy to making this successful. Everyone has their opinions and I respect that, but I am more interested on hearing solutions if you see there is no progress. Simply asking for change but knowing what change means to all of us will have no takers!
yep, they did, they called email me and asked me to contact other people and organize in a state chapter level. They are also helping on getting other people to help me mobilize members from a state chapter level. The point is the sense of urgency on how we need to move forward together. There is absolutely no room for confusion and I agree when people dont see results, there is always suspicion. But to build an organization from scratch is no easy task, we must recognize that and be respectful of people who do put their time and efforts to make things happen. We all must channelize our energy to making this successful. Everyone has their opinions and I respect that, but I am more interested on hearing solutions if you see there is no progress. Simply asking for change but knowing what change means to all of us will have no takers!
more...
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santb1975
05-29 03:54 PM
His name should be on the list
vadicherla has contributed $100 and updated the old contribution thread...
vadicherla has contributed $100 and updated the old contribution thread...
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praky
09-11 04:30 PM
Count me in. I think effort will be worth if we have more IV members participating.
more...
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chanduv23
09-13 03:21 PM
Order Details - Sep 13, 2007 12:40 PM GMT-07:00
Google Order #949176417011663
Great, and please make it to the rally
Google Order #949176417011663
Great, and please make it to the rally
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gonecrazyonh4
04-25 11:04 AM
My husband has been working on H1B with a leading company in USA since early 2000. Our Labor was filed in March 2005 and is stuck at BEC. I am on H4 and am not able to work or contribute.
One of our friends starting working in USA through a consultant in late 2004. Filed his I-140 directly with a substitute PD in June 2005. They received their EAD same year in October 2005 and received his physical Green card on February 2006 . He used a priority date of 1999 due to his substitute PD. Now he is a free bird and can move jobs, his wife can work and they receive all the benefits of green card.
How fair can this be?
We are unable to move, take up a better job, receive a promotion or take up fulltime studies even after getting admission in best Universities due to our Visa situation.
Sweeping changes are necessary in immigration rules and the date the person starts to work on H1B should be considered as the priority date. It will eliminate lot of corruption and reward those who truly contribute to the economy.
One of our friends starting working in USA through a consultant in late 2004. Filed his I-140 directly with a substitute PD in June 2005. They received their EAD same year in October 2005 and received his physical Green card on February 2006 . He used a priority date of 1999 due to his substitute PD. Now he is a free bird and can move jobs, his wife can work and they receive all the benefits of green card.
How fair can this be?
We are unable to move, take up a better job, receive a promotion or take up fulltime studies even after getting admission in best Universities due to our Visa situation.
Sweeping changes are necessary in immigration rules and the date the person starts to work on H1B should be considered as the priority date. It will eliminate lot of corruption and reward those who truly contribute to the economy.
more...
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Caliber
05-15 03:47 PM
Finally at last today the web site shows that my Labor is certified. I am really glad at it. PBEC has shown us the HELL on earth and though I am 43 years old, I feel like much older than that due these PBEC guys. They never realize that this is our biggest milestone.
My NOF was on Prevailing Wage as my pay was 65K and PBEC wanted to increase it to 87K. But our attorney's have submitted third party surveys and we have given up thinking that PBEC will not agree for it.
I know how hard it is to live without a status. I pray that PBEC guys releases every one from their HELL. Details are in my signature.
My NOF was on Prevailing Wage as my pay was 65K and PBEC wanted to increase it to 87K. But our attorney's have submitted third party surveys and we have given up thinking that PBEC will not agree for it.
I know how hard it is to live without a status. I pray that PBEC guys releases every one from their HELL. Details are in my signature.
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snathan
08-12 02:25 PM
aiming london shooting tokyo, thats exactly what this bill is doing. The vast majority of nonsense is created by small "con"sulting companies, i.e shell companies with less than 50 employees. Infact Schummer if he wanted a solution for h1b missue should have gone after these small "con"sulting companies rather than real multi national companies like infosys,tcs, wipro etc. I am not a fan of this bill but if you going to put restrictions on h1b do it the right way. it is these small "con"sulting companies with less than 50 employees that did illegal things like selling approved labor until using approved labor was abolished, it is these small "con"sulting companies which work on 80 20 model which are bringing disrepute to h1b and people working on h1b. by putting this rediculous rule which says only comapnies having more than 50 employess will be targetted by this law schummer inadvertently is encouraging the setup of more "con"sulting companies. The vast majority of green cards issued in the last 5 years (may be as hight as 80% of green cards) have been issued to the "con"sultants" working in these "con"sulting companies. People working in fortune 500 companies abide by all rules like it is the job responsibily which determines eb1, eb2 or eb3 and not your educational qualifications and therefore i have seen phd recepients applying in eb3 whereas the "con"sultants working in these "con"sulting companies who have sometimes b.sc bcom or btech degrees applying in eb2 by faking experience to show 5 years requirement, they work in SAP but they advertise the position as someone needing java or any programming experience. this is outright lying, how can people working in fortune 500 and legitemate companies complete with these "con"sultants and these "con"sulting companies with less than 50 employees for green cards.
For green card reform the biggest culprit is per country limit\quota, the above issue is small compared to the country quota but it still needs to be solved.
before somebody says illogical things like crab dragging another crab down etc etc, let me tell you something all i am saying is everybody should play by the rules, "con"sulting companies especially with less than 50 employees and the "con"sultants who work there are the ones which have brought disrepute to the h1b profession by indulging in labor selling and buying, applying for eb1, eb2 irrespective of job requirements and flouting the rules, for the most part big It majors infy, wipro etc did not indulge in these illegal activities.
Do not generalise all consulting companies...At least people working in these consulting companies sponsored GC and buying house and spending their money here. Most of the fradulent GC process was done by these croocked indian companies. They exploited the EB1C system to the maximum extend. Most of the times, they are not filing the GC and keep the employees as slaves or they exploit the EB1c fo their boot lickers.
For green card reform the biggest culprit is per country limit\quota, the above issue is small compared to the country quota but it still needs to be solved.
before somebody says illogical things like crab dragging another crab down etc etc, let me tell you something all i am saying is everybody should play by the rules, "con"sulting companies especially with less than 50 employees and the "con"sultants who work there are the ones which have brought disrepute to the h1b profession by indulging in labor selling and buying, applying for eb1, eb2 irrespective of job requirements and flouting the rules, for the most part big It majors infy, wipro etc did not indulge in these illegal activities.
Do not generalise all consulting companies...At least people working in these consulting companies sponsored GC and buying house and spending their money here. Most of the fradulent GC process was done by these croocked indian companies. They exploited the EB1C system to the maximum extend. Most of the times, they are not filing the GC and keep the employees as slaves or they exploit the EB1c fo their boot lickers.
more...
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for_gc
08-14 07:02 PM
Guys good news from my side. Just got most awaited Card production Ordered emails for my wife and my son. ...
Congratulations Conchshell !!
You really seem to be a very level headed guy. Hats off to you !
Congratulations Conchshell !!
You really seem to be a very level headed guy. Hats off to you !
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eb3_nepa
07-14 02:29 PM
Dear IVians
Please make it happen. Just $5 will never hurt anybody's economy / budget.
I wanted to cover 9 more souls if there is any acute shortage of even $5 (not to offend anyone), hence sent a check for $50
Suport IV
Satya
Excellent job Satya. People please learn from Satya's example.
Please contribute $5 for yourself and $5 for your spouse. NO other website asks for donations as low as $5.
Please make it happen. Just $5 will never hurt anybody's economy / budget.
I wanted to cover 9 more souls if there is any acute shortage of even $5 (not to offend anyone), hence sent a check for $50
Suport IV
Satya
Excellent job Satya. People please learn from Satya's example.
Please contribute $5 for yourself and $5 for your spouse. NO other website asks for donations as low as $5.
more...
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tinamatthew
07-20 12:37 PM
What happens if I get my EAD after 180 days of concurrent filing i-140 & i-485, and my employer no longer has a vacancy for me. Can I start at another job or do I have to refile the i-140. (I'm not presently working for the company yet - Schedule A applicant)
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GCBy3000
02-12 02:26 PM
Check here on how to support IV with contribution.
http://immigrationvoice.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=26&Itemid=25
Hi All,
I'm new to immigration Voice. I've read abt this in immigration portal and understand that a group of people are leading this. I wish them all the best and i extend my full support. Also i heard that this group is collecting funds. Can someone please point me where would i contribute.
Thanks
RAJ
SWA: Virginia
SWA Receipt Date (Priority Date): October 31,2002
EB2 - RIR
Forwarded to Philadelphia Regional DOL on June 22, 2004
BEC Case Number: P-04282-*****
45 Day Letter Received and Replied : Feb 2005
http://immigrationvoice.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=26&Itemid=25
Hi All,
I'm new to immigration Voice. I've read abt this in immigration portal and understand that a group of people are leading this. I wish them all the best and i extend my full support. Also i heard that this group is collecting funds. Can someone please point me where would i contribute.
Thanks
RAJ
SWA: Virginia
SWA Receipt Date (Priority Date): October 31,2002
EB2 - RIR
Forwarded to Philadelphia Regional DOL on June 22, 2004
BEC Case Number: P-04282-*****
45 Day Letter Received and Replied : Feb 2005
more...
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MDix
08-23 09:17 AM
If they could they would have, but unfortunately judgment doesn't talk anything about Multinational manager.They tried to extend he finding of EB1 to EB2. I believe even thought this strictly applies to EB2 without M.S. But things will get tough for EB2 Master also ......
Why there is nothing for EB Multinational Managers? Even a small project manager gets a priority greencard and people with masters degree and 10 year experience are waiting. Nobody has told to USCIS yet?
Where is GCperm when you need one?
Why there is nothing for EB Multinational Managers? Even a small project manager gets a priority greencard and people with masters degree and 10 year experience are waiting. Nobody has told to USCIS yet?
Where is GCperm when you need one?
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chintu25
09-11 04:40 PM
Singhsa
I am in
:mad::mad::mad:
I am in
:mad::mad::mad:
more...
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Milind123
09-16 12:02 PM
Thank you Nagireddi and Nagaraj for those quick shots. It is definitely a good start. Folks, this is a long round, so please step up and fire your shots. While we are still waiting for the Guest lady/gentleman from the West Coast, please take your shots; everyone is welcome.
I will be stepping out for sometime so please be kind enough to bump this thread if it goes off screen.
I will be stepping out for sometime so please be kind enough to bump this thread if it goes off screen.
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GCwaitforever
12-26 03:00 PM
Bad news unless they allow mass conversion of TR applications into non-RIR. Imagine they took two years to get rid of 220,000 easier applications (2005 and 2006). Now they are left with some of the old TR applications and they must be thinking of how to meet the September deadline. I would not be surprised if they ask for an extension, citing processing difficulties.
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rameshk75
05-22 03:31 PM
People are very busy since morning looking for a positive news regarding the amendments..there is no time to contribute !!
IV members, try to contribute otherwise nothing will happen without lobbying !!
IV members, try to contribute otherwise nothing will happen without lobbying !!
eb3_nepa
07-14 01:27 PM
I know some of you must think:
"What the heck difference is FIVE dollars going to make?????"
Well $5 x 30,000 = $150,000 I hope people understand that, $150,000 is NOTHING to sneeze at. So people, you dont even need to dig too deep. Just FIVE DOLLARS.
Less than the cost of a SUBWAY Sandwich LUNCH.
"What the heck difference is FIVE dollars going to make?????"
Well $5 x 30,000 = $150,000 I hope people understand that, $150,000 is NOTHING to sneeze at. So people, you dont even need to dig too deep. Just FIVE DOLLARS.
Less than the cost of a SUBWAY Sandwich LUNCH.
GKBest
08-20 08:02 PM
My wife's DL renewal is pending for more than 2 months...When we contacted DMV they said its pending clearance from DHS (homeland security) and it could take take 120+ days to get their approval.
Has anybody encountered this recently?
Thanks
You can ask for a temporary license good for 90 days and re-apply again until you get the DMV card renewal.
Has anybody encountered this recently?
Thanks
You can ask for a temporary license good for 90 days and re-apply again until you get the DMV card renewal.
